Monday, December 21, 2009

Houseguest

Well, it looks like my MIL will be coming here for the time being, starting tomorrow.  So tonight will be spent getting Colleen's room ready for MIL and moving Colleen into the home office/sewing room, which incidentally looks like a paper and fabric clutter bomb has exploded in it. 

Then we'll re-evaluate this situation at the start of the new year, because Dave and I both agree that  this shouldn't be permanent.  And even though I think it's not permanent, why-oh-why do I feel myself panicking already?

Maybe it's because since the summer, I've enjoyed my "alone time" so much.  That whole empty-nest thing was pretty short lived and over the past few months I've been very happy to have time to myself devoted to my stitching and reading.  Everybody else in my family had their self-indulgences and I finally had mine again, too.  I'm panicking because I want to hold on to that and I don't know if it's possible.

Selfish?  Probably.  But I'm trying to be up front about it. 

OK, I'm tired of talking and writing about this.  I'm moving on and my next posts will be about things that are more fun and interesting!

14 comments:

  1. I am so sorry to hear about your MIL. My DH, David, and I went through the same thing with his mother 3 years ago. David's sister took care of her while she was still at home but once she started sun-downing, the doctor told us it was time to make a decision. It was the hardest thing in the world to do because she had always been such an independent person and was so afraid of going to a nursing home, where her mother had passed away from dementia many years before. Thank God he is merciful because it got to the point where she didn't even realize she was in a nursing home. The truth is, you are putting them at risk, not to mention what it does to your own health, by trying to take care of them yourself. It's impossible. They need to be watched every minute. I'm not saying this to frighten you but let you know that some tough decisions will have to be made. My prayers are with all of you.

    ReplyDelete
  2. My thoughts are with you during this stay and know that you are not the only one with a fabric clutter bomb. I just didn't have that clever of a title for what I simply refered to as "My Me Space"
    Here's wishing you a Merry Christmas and a very Healthy 2010
    Be always in stitches.

    ReplyDelete
  3. I know the feeling of having my space. I think we all need a little my space - women particularly need this. My prayers are with you as you make tough decisions. Hugs

    ReplyDelete
  4. Hope everything will work out for the best for both you and your MIL. Just remember to breathe!

    ReplyDelete
  5. Praying for you and that you all can come up with the best situation for everyone. Hope you have a merry Christmas!

    ReplyDelete
  6. Thoughts and prayers for you. It is not easy having aging parents. Just keep thinking that mil isn't there permanently. Once that busy Christmas season is over you will be better able to come up with your alternatives and make choices.

    ReplyDelete
  7. I am so sorry to hear about everything. I don't think it is selfish at all for you to think like that. I feel the same way. Hopefully you will come up with another alternative. Good luck.

    ReplyDelete
  8. I understand why you're entering this new living situation with your mil with trepidation, especially after a brief interlude of wonderful alone time. Sending you a big hug and hoping that you and your husband can find a good solution for everyone in the New Year.

    ReplyDelete
  9. Look, I would be feeling exactly the same, if not worse. Don't feel bad. I hope there is a solution that will appear quickly - isn't Christams about miracles ?
    All the best, Valie

    ReplyDelete
  10. Take deep breaths, think about enjoying the holidays and your family, keep your wine glass handy, and after some time, you'll be able to see a way through this difficult situation. Geez, I sound just like my mom!

    ReplyDelete
  11. Lee, you are not being selfish--not in the least. Mothers give up so much of themselves to raise their children, that when the empty nest comes it is just natural to want those pieces of you back again. I, too, feel like this is "me" time. I know you and Dave will work out a long-term solution that is good for all of you...

    Sending you a big hug and wishing all five(!) of you a Merry Christmas!

    ReplyDelete
  12. MY FIL lived with us for about a month after he and his wife lost their home in a flood. It's hard, no doubt about it. I will be thinking of you.
    Tammy

    ReplyDelete
  13. Lee, I'll keep you in my prayers. This is going to be hard for sure. I pray everyone will be able to make the right decision for your MIL. and I'll pray for patience for you. :-)
    Robin

    ReplyDelete
  14. Thanks for your comment on my blog. I do sympathize with you. I would be glad it's another woman and not a man-I can't even imagine having my husband's father here as he has some odd habits and old school (can see waiting on him-ugh). When youe MIL is there a few weeks, that will give you time to access the situation. My mom's hearing and eyesight is going and now she is getting delusional. She was here 3 days and made 2 of them miserable for us. My brother moved in her home and he is her last chance, though she says he is nasty with her, etc. I'm afraid if she doesn't get counseling, she'll have to go in a home. Sad stuff.

    ReplyDelete